Friday, March 30, 2018

Caregiving Bumps in the Road

It's ironic - now that I have so much to write about, I'm not writing about it anymore.

My autistic brother in law has receded into the background while we try to deal with issues surrounding my elderly mother in law, who is in the early stages of dementia.

Several evenings a week, we ('we' meaning family members in our area) have arranged for an agency to provide a home health aide to make supper for my mother in law, make sure she takes her meds (she can't manage them on her own anymore) and make sure she goes to bed with her oxygen on (on her own, she claims she doesn't need oxyge.  She does).

If a family member visits, she tends not to remember the next day.


We found out one aide wasn't doing her job, after a friend came over to visit and found some interesting things.  That aide lasted three weeks.  The current aide is good, but had car trouble - came one night via taxi (which probably ate up most of her pay for the night) and the next night, wasn't able to come - and the agency couldn't find a replacement.

So we and the friend all pitched in.  My spouse made dinner.  He had already visited his Mom earlier, after doing shopping.  He also did some of her financial affairs.

It never ends...until one day when it will end.

Meanwhile, "Bil" isn't feeling well, and, although he is supposed to come to his Mom's today for a weekend visit, we aren't sure what will happen.  When he left to go to his apartment this past Monday, she couldn't remember, a half hour later, when he was going to return.  She has become unmoored from time.

And, earlier this week, she couldn't remember her son's phone number, a number he has had for 31 years.

Ah, the joys of caregiving.


  1. Hiya - take care of you ... as life take's its course - just very difficult, but I appreciate the odd post so we know what's happening ... all the very best for you and for them - Hilary


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