Monday, June 23, 2014

So Where is the Support for the Spouses?

I applaud this blogger for posting various support resources for siblings of someone with a disability.  They need all the support they can get.

Just one little issue I have with this list.

Where is the support for the spouses/significant others of siblings?

I am reluctant to join any kind of support group for sibs.  Their struggle is not my struggle.  Their experience is not my experience.  I don't want to intrude in their support of each other.  I'm not even sure I would be welcome.

Am I selfish in wondering where my support is?  There is some general support out there "for families".  But, we are lumped in with "parents, spouses...."

Parents get their own support groups.

Sibs get their own support groups.

We spouses or significant others "signed up" voluntarily, knowing the people we loved enough to live with or marry had these special individuals in our lives.  We help caregive.  We help research their future.  We spend time with the disabled member.  We do so many things, yet there is no safe place for us to discuss our particular needs.  Where is the support group where I can feel safe to vent?

Am I the only person who feels the way I do?

Does anyone care?

Sometimes I feel that, as the spouse of a sibling, I exist in some kind of support limbo. 

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