"Bil" had his annual review recently, and the topic of housing for Bil, once my mother in law can no longer care for him, came up.
Let me backtrack a little Bil lives with his mother. He always has, for the almost 60 years of his life. For almost all of them, he lived in the same house. In 2015, he and his mother moved up here to be closer to two of her other children, and they moved into an apartment in a senior complex.
Once his Mom can no longer stay in the apartment due to physical or health issues, the State of New York will not let him stay there by himself (which would not be a good idea, anyway), because Bil has a developmental disability called autism. At this point in his life, he can not live independently. He doesn't have the skills.
We had a coming attraction about his ability to live on his own when his mother became sick a bit more than a year ago, and had to be hospitalized. The hospitalization was followed by rehab. At her age, lying in a hospital bed causes rapid physical deterioration.
Bil did not want to live with one of his nearby siblings. He didn't mind being by himself. I'm sure that is because he was in control of his environment. He could keep the lights dimmed, the TV on as he chose, and do what he wanted. No wild parties - just being on his own.
We knew he needed our support, and we did live in the area. We would check in on him, make sure things were OK, bring food, and take him out when needed.
There were just a few problems, and they became apparent quickly.
To Be Continued.