Friday, March 31, 2017

The Wisdom of "Gone With the Wind"

Today, for Friday Reflections, I am pondering this quote:

“Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect.” - Margaret Mitchell

This is a quote from the American classic novel "Gone with the Wind". The full quote is taken from a conversation between the heroine of the book, Scarlett O'Hara, and a man she once thought she was in love with, Ashley.

Once they were young and idealistic.  Then, the United States Civil War came, bringing suffering, poverty, death, and more suffering.  Now, after the war, Scarlet was speaking.

“We’ve come a long way since those days, Ashley,” she said, trying to steady her voice, trying to fight the constriction in her throat. “We had fine notions then, didn’t we?” And then, with a rush, “Oh, Ashley, nothing has turned out as we expected!”

“It never does,” he said. “Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect. We take what we get and are thankful it’s no worse than it is.”

Years ago, when my husband and I were in our late teens, we never dreamed how the future would turn out.  We were self-absorbed. My brother-in-law with autism, "Bil", was invisible to us in our youth, someone who spent all his time hidden in his room.  We never dreamed of how, one day, he would cause us hours and days of worry. 

There is much that is uncertain right now.  I haven't blogged about a lot of it, and I should.  But, briefly, he was on a list to get housing when his mother can no longer care for him, and the list no longer exists.  There is another list, years long, and, due to a "catch-22" (another literary expression!) he can not be put on that list.

Other options are limited.  And, with budget cuts, his options are shrinking.  In the meantime, he wants to live on his own, which will not be possible without extensive support.  That takes money.

And we are all getting older.  The clock, as they say, is ticking.

We know now what we didn't know then. We and (he) have quite a journey ahead of us.  I intend to write about some of that, and other of my thoughts about Bil, in April, for the Blogging from A to Z Challenge.  I hope to write a book one day, and hope that A to Z can help me focus on just what I want to write about.

My theme is - Journeying Through the Unknown.  

This April, I will blog daily, Monday through Saturday, and on the last day of April.  On April 1st, the topic of my post will begin with the letter A.  On Monday, April 3, it will begin with B, and so on.

After that, we'll just have to see where this journey is taking us, and Bil.  I'm not giving up - no, far from it, but we must take different directions, and some are unproven.

Join Sanch Vee and Corinne Rodriguez each Friday for #FridayReflections.


  1. Certainly a very true quote. The book you're planning to write sounds like it will be excellent. Good luck with all the challenges you face - writing ones and otherwise. I love that last paragraph. Hope the different direction is fruitful.

  2. Looking forward to reading your posts. I know that your writing will be most helpful for others making the same journey with a loved one.


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