Thursday, December 27, 2012

The Birthday

Not Bil's, but a beloved aunt who is a centenarian.  She will be having a birthday in January, with a little party.  She is frail, but has all her mental facilities, and is a delight to be around.

Bil is expecting to be able to go to her party.

Mom doesn't drive long distances anymore, and this relative lives over one/half hour away from this aunt.  That means another relative will have to take her.  We live too far away, so another relative will have to do this, and that will all depend on the weather.

But Bil doesn't accept "we don't know", "it all depends", and anything with uncertainty. One thing I am trying to expose him to, more and more, is that life is uncertain.

At least, the last few times we've visited, Bil hasn't asked, when we were barely in the door, when we were going to leave.  I did not want him to do that because, while I understand that he has a need to know in order to structure his world, it is also a very rude question.

Bil seemed to accept the "we don't know, it depends on the weather" for whether he will be able to go to the aunt's party. And the funny thing is, once he is there, he will just stare into space, or sit with everyone as long as there is food - and once the food is eaten, he will go watch TV.

It still puzzles me.  I intellectually understand.  But it still puzzles me.

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