I am "inbetween". Siblings have their support websites. Parents have their support websites. In laws have....well, we make it up as we go along. As our special needs charges sometimes slip through cracks in life and in "the system", well, the in laws do to.
Sometimes it doesn't seem fair. But then I read a story like this one.
I have to respect what my husband was...well he wasn't born into it because Bil is younger than him, but never the less he didn't "sign up". When I married, it was for love, and maybe an understanding because my father was disabled. But I doubt it, I think it was more youth marrying for love and not for what the future might bring.
For what it is worth, Bil will never be able (in my best judgment, and in the judgment of his Medicaid Service Coordinator) to be quite as independent as the author's brother.
Still, the man who wrote that article in the NY Times was able to "step up to the plate" when it was time. I know one day we will get that dreaded phone call, and it will be our time.
Why does planning for that day seem like walking through gluey quicksand?