This is one of those "elephant in the closet" topics - I truly hope I don't offend anyone who knows me, because some parents of children with autism have been of very great help to me during our journey of discovery and learning with bil.
However:
It is my observation that there is a big divide between siblings and parents, and not just in the autism area, perhaps for all "special needs". But I can only speak to our own personal situation, which has to do with autism.
To set the stage: my husband is the oldest of 4. His first brother (typical) is 17 months younger. His brother, the one with autism, is 6 years younger. There is also a sister.
I am not the parent of a child (growing or adult) with autism, nor am I a sib. But I am a parent, and also the wife of a sib. We've been married a long time. And bil has been in my life, one way or another, for almost 40 years. So perhaps I have a unique view of the whole situation.
Anyway, what set this off was a random comment by my mother in law when we brought my brother in law back home.
I can't quote her exactly now, but she made a comment to the affect that my husband had not spent a whole lot of time with his brother growing up so it was really nice that he spent a week with his brother now.
More in Part 2.
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